Challenges

I love challenges. I guess its because it gives me a chance to prove myself that I can do things I dont normally do or would hesitate to do .... Although, I rarely put myself up for it and people had to do it for me. So this years resolution is to grab every opurtunity that I get and to stop being soo effin negative about everything.

Last years "challenge" was joining the School pageant (HAH!). Yeah, so that was forced on me too. I honestly hate pageants or hated pageants (i dunno). I hate/hated it because

ONE: I dont like being judged by my physical appearance (which coincidentally was the question they asked me in the Q&A). I hate hate hate it. I think its rooted from past experiences, where I felt like I was not at par with what society considers to be beautiful. it's a load of bull, i know. But, growing up in a country where people only consider the mestizas to be beautiful- its kind of natural to think that way.

TWO: I do not like being compared to other people. Which is but natural in pageants. Its kind of because I sometimes feel inadequate and also because no two people are alike so I dont think its fair to compare people. haha

THREE: I do not feel like I need to be scrutinized and to have to exert much effort into making people believe or try to convince people that I am beautiful. BECAUSE I AM! belat! haha

FOUR: Does anyone really need to join those things? I see it as one way of trying to seek approval. And its nonsense. If youre sure of yourself, you dont need validation from anyone.

I can go on with this list, but its mainly because of my first reason. You dont immediately get to that point where the norms dont bug you anymore. Soo, you doubt yourself of being capable. But I am secretly and highly competitive though. hahaha. (BIG emphasis on secretly!) If you remember me asking you in college what your score was on a test, I wasnt as concerned of how you did but of how I did! hahaha. I do go about it differently though, so I may not seem like it. And I hold nothing against those I secretly compete against hahaha. Its gotten to a point where I dont think its normal anymore- I think it should go away after school age years- but thats off topic. LOL. The good thing about being competitive is that once you get into something, you really do go all out or at least try to do your best. I mean, youre already there so might as well go through the whole shebang without having to be shy or whatever.

So anyway, it turned out to be a great experience. For a couple of hours, I didnt feel like I had stage fright haha. Thanks to my friends, family and the Nursing department too! they were all very encouraging and really supportive. And everyone was so nice, and it wasnt like what you saw in movies where all the girls were catty and plotted against each other. haha. Oh no wait, there were some stuff that were odd and well some people who acted nice and all that crap but they really werent haha But I got along with everyone so that wasnt much of a problem.

P.S.: I won too, so that made the experience a 100 times better! haha

L: With MJ, Venus, Gang and Junneth; R: With the HRS Deparment Professors, Heads and Dean

L: With the other Pageant winners; R: My good friends from Grade school, High school and College! :)

L&R: With Jane who was the previous year's winner, my group/duty mate, blockmate and BFF haha

L: With my family =); R: With my blockmates! :)

My Girlaloos!

A few of the photos from the pageant and from the shoot.

More images HERE, HERE and HERE